Discalced

So my favorite blogger ever would be the most wonderful and talented Laine. Her blog: thisisforthefireworks.blogspot.com is incredibly amazing! I mean she's one of my best friends so I may be a little biased. But, overall I would have to say I truly love reading her blog. It's actually my most visited site now that I've deleted my facebook (just temporarily.. well maybe) and don't have to go to eaglenet too often. Anyways, I like it a lot because one, she is a beautiful writer (I think you chose the right major) and two, I get to see a side of my friend is super amazing and special. The way she talks about her friends and family is super heartfelt and makes me remember how much I love them too. I also love the sometimes corny little side jokes and the overall free spirited atmosphere of it. However, it can be very serious which is also great and needed. So all in all, her blog is kinda my starting point to this whole blogging stuff.. So if anything in mine seems similar to hers its because it is. As you can see I like her creativity and think the overall blog is great, I probably will be stealing some ideas from my dear friend. Just giving credit where credit it due! And really you should check out her blog; it's cool.

Anxiety....

12:49 in the morning.. wave of anxiousness.. My stomach feels queasy, I don't want to sleep and my mind is freaking out.
Where did it come from?
Why is it here?
How do I get away from it?
Questions of who I am, what I'm doing, who am I supposed to be.
My future holds questions, my future holds worry.
It affects my sleeping, endless dreams of unsavory situations. clenched aching jaw.
What to do?

But there is a glimmer of hope.
I know my Lord and Savior.
He is my everything. He holds my future.
In his hands my worry is gone.
In his hands the questions are answered.
In his hands I sleep like a child in their mother's lap.
He is my hope. He is my salvation.
With Him by my side whom shall I fear?
This is the truth I seek. The answer to my troubles.
Without him all would be lost.
The anxiety is still there but the known truth is ringing clear.
Waiting for me to turn my ear and listen.
"Trust in me, I will take care of you."

The Dance

I want to be like that...

"Where I close my eyes

and throw back my head

and stand up to dance with You.

My tiny hand in your infinite one.

My steps so clumsy compared to Your Grace.

The music begins and

we step out onto the floor.

My grip tightens, 

knowing I will fall but also

knowing you will guide me.

And the music swells,

roaring in my eyes until 

I am so captured that

I cannot look at anyone but You.

My hands feel poised for the next step,

My head up,

a smile of love on my face,

my eyes lock with Yours...

And then, maybe then, 

I will not even notice when

You turn to one of your sons 

and invite him to dance with me."

-author unknown

I'm having trouble explaining how much this poems means to me. Many times I find myself worrying about the future and how it's going to work out. Countless hours of thought have been lost to this wondering. But this poem has always been a reminder of how I should dance through life holding on to the hands of my Creator. I rediscovered it a few weeks ago; it's always been in the front of my Bible but I hadn't actually read it in months. However, God has this funny thing about perfect timing. So after I read it the other day it has slowly been refocusing me back to God and back to the dance that were dancing. Distractions had crept in and are not completely gone yet but they have been greatly pulling me away from my eyes being locked on Christ's.  But gazing into Christ's eyes takes away a lot of the worry. In his sight everything will be okay. I know that if I focus on God then the worries will work themselves out. Matthew 6:25-33 tells me that I don't need to worry about this life he care so much about his creation and will never let me down. I know the Lord loves me for who I am and he is guiding my life. When I fall down he picks me up he lets me stand on his feet and dances me around the floor.The music of life gently plays and I am completely safe.